Psychosexual problems

Psychosexual problems

Intimate or personal issues including psychosexual problems can be very difficult for people to seek help for. They are surprisingly common in both men and women. You be assured that any sexual problems are always dealt with in a sensitive and professional manner.

Richard wain solves psychosexula problems Hynotherapy Dartford, Gravesend, Kent, Cressingham

psychosexual problems can be quickly resolved using the Flourish Programme

However; we need to be sure that the problems are of a psychosexual nature and not a medical condition – physiological in origin. I can still work with people that have non-psychosexual problems and need help coming to terms with their loss of full sexuality.

Sexual problems may due to age, medication or depression. Individuals who take drugs to lower blood pressure, uses antipsychotics, antidepressants, sedatives, narcotics, antacids or alcohol can have problems with sexual function and loss of libido.

Although psychosexual dysfunction is not life threatening, it can have a major effect on relationships and a person’s self-esteem.

Psychosexual disorders may be due to:

  • a guilty conscience
  • stress
  • anxiety or nervousness and worry
  • fear
  • depression,
  • emotional trauma such as abuse, rape, etc.
  • cultural aspects.
  • ignorance due to improper sex education
  • conflict of values between sexual feelings and family or religion

There are many others as well.

Hypersexuality in both men and woemen is a clinical diagnosis used by mental healthcare researchers and providers to describe extremely frequent or suddenly increased sexual urges or sexual activity. The terms nymphomania and satyriasis were once used to describe the condition, in women and men respectively, but are no longer in general medical use. The evidence tends to point towards a physiological cause rather than psychological one.

Below are two lists of the most common psychosexual problems I see people for.

Common problems for men include:

  • Not able to keep an erection
  • Premature Ejaculation (occur too soon)
  • Delayed or unable to Ejaculate
  • Not able to become aroused when appropriately stimulated
  • Not able to achieve orgasm
  • Inhibited sexual desire

I will discuss the most common ones I deal with briefly.

Premature ejaculation (PE)

Premature ejaculation is also known as rapid ejaculation, rapid climax, premature climax, early ejaculation or simply, coming too soon. Premature ejaculation is when ejaculation occurs before the partner achieves orgasm, or a mutually satisfactory length of time has passed during intercourse. There is no correct length of time for intercourse to last, but generally, premature ejaculation is thought to occur when ejaculation occurs in under 2 minutes from the time of the insertion of the penis.

PE may not seem a problem to a man that has it – after all it is normal to him.


Also known as Male Erectile Disorder or Erectile dysfunction, this is the condition which causes men to have difficulty in getting an erection, or cannot maintain an

Flourish Programme for Psychosexual problems

Young man feeling depressed and anxious over erectile dysfunction

erection during sex. This can lead to feeling like a failure, frustration, feelings of inadequacy, feelings of rejection and feeling ‘on the spot’.

It can occasionally happen to any man but if he dwells on that one time he can develop an anxiety about it which becomes a self-fulfilling prophesy.

Stress, lack of fitness and substances can have a dramatic effect on lowering a man’s ability to perform. In most men impotence is due to a physical or medical condition such as hormonal decline or diabetes, cardiovascular disease, multiple sclerosis, kidney failure, vascular disease and spinal cord injury.

Symptoms for women include:

  • Not able to become aroused when appropriately stimulated
  • Not able to achieve orgasm
  • Inhibited sexual desire
  • Vaginismus—an unconscious spasm, or tightening of the muscles around the vagina stopping penetration.
  • Experiencing pain during sex
  • Dry vagina

It is estimated that about one in three women will experience some form of sexual dysfunction. This may lead to women’s loss of confidence in her sex life. as a result their sex life with their partners become a burden but not pleasure, and eventually, women may lose their interest in sexual activity.

There are different situations, some of them find it hard to be aroused mentally, however, some are physical problems. There are several factors that affect female dysfunction:

  • women do not trust with her sex partner
  • environment where women have sex is crucial – an extremely public or extremely private place may make women feel uncomfortable.
  • not concentrating on the sex activity due to bad mood or burden from the work may also cause women’s sexual dysfunction.


Vaginismus, sometimes called vaginism, is a condition that affects a woman’s ability to engage in vaginal penetration, including sexual intercourse, manual penetration, insertion of tampons and the penetration involved in gynecological examinations. This is the result of an involuntary vaginal muscle spasm, which

Femaile spyschosexula issues

Do not let a psychosexual problem ruin your life get rapid help right now.

makes any kind of vaginal penetration painful or impossible.

She does not consciously control the spasm, the vaginismic reflex is the same as the eye shutting when an object comes towards it. The severity of vaginismus, and the pain during penetration (including sexual penetration), varies greatly from woman to woman

A woman is said to have primary vaginismus when she is unable to have penetrative sex or experience vaginal penetration without pain. It is commonly discovered in teenage girls and women in their teens or early twenties when first attempt to use tampons, have penetrative sex or masturbate.

Usually women with vaginismus are unaware of the condition until they attempt vaginal penetration. Most women are unaware of the reasons for their condition.

Common reasons are:

  • urinary tract infections
  • vaginal yeast infections
  • sexual abuse, rape, other sexual assault, or attempted sexual abuse or assault
  • knowledge of (or witnessing) sexual or physical abuse of others, without being personally abused
  • domestic violence or similar conflict in the early home environment
  • fear of pain associated with penetration, particularly the popular misconception of “breaking” the hymen upon the first attempt at penetration, or the idea that vaginal penetration will inevitably hurt the first time it occurs
  • chronic pain conditions and harm-avoidance behaviour
  • any physically invasive trauma (not necessarily involving or even near the genitals)
  • generalised anxiety
  • stress
  • negative emotional reaction towards sexual stimulation, e.g. disgust both at a deliberate level and also at a more implicit level
  • strict conservative moral education, which also can elicit negative emotions

Secondary vaginismus occurs when a person who has previously been able to achieve penetration develops vaginismus. This may be due to physical causes such as a yeast infection or trauma during childbirth, while in some cases it may be due to psychological causes, or to a combination of causes.

Other factors that may contribute to either secondary vaginismus include:

  • Fear of losing control
  • Not trusting one’s partner
  • Self-consciousness about body image
  • Misconceptions about sex or unattainable standards for sex from exaggerated sexual materials, such as pornography or abstinence
  • Fear of vagina not being wide or deep enough / fear of partner’s penis being too large
  • Undiscovered or denied sexuality (specifically, being asexual or lesbian)
  • Undiscovered or denied feelings of being transgender (specifically, a trans man)


Also known as Inorgasmia is the medical term for regular difficulty reaching orgasm after ample sexual stimulation, causing you personal distress. Anorgasmia is a common occurrence, affecting a significant number of women.

Orgasms vary in intensity, and women vary in the frequency of their orgasms and the amount of stimulation necessary to trigger an orgasm. In fact, most women don’t consistently have orgasms with vaginal penetration alone.

Strength, frequency and duration of orgasms often change with age – hormones, medical issues or medications you’re taking.


Technically known as Hypoactive Sexual Desire Disorder. Loss of sex drive, lack of interest in sex or low libido can cause frustration and problems within a relationship. One partner (usually female but not always) avoids sexual intercourse, avoids sexual thoughts, has no desire for sex, has a fear of being intimate etc.

The condition ranges from a general lack of sexual desire to a lack of sexual desire for the current partner. The condition may have started after a period of normal sexual functioning or the person may always have had no/low sexual desire.

The Flourish Programme for treating psychosexual problems

Flourish Hypnotherapy by Richard Wain

Flourish Hypnotherapy is Phase 1 of the Flourish Programme. It can get people where they need to be in just 2-3 sessions.

The Flourish Programme is in 2 phases – Phase 1: Working on the immediate problems using Flourish Hypnotherapy.

Phase 2: Life Builder© to provide ongoing support until recovery is complete. (Optional – not all people need this).

Psychosexual issues  will often have their root in unhelpful ways of thinking – even though we may be unaware of them. The Flourish Hypnotherapy does not need us to find these and analyse them it will just allow you to get back in control of your thoughts and feelings in sexual situations.

A major stumbling block is self belief in the bedroom. Another is self-image. The Flourish Programme will give you your self esteem back and eradicate limiting beliefs about yourself in sexual situations. Fear and expectancy are often the cause of erectile dysfunction and vaginismus  That the problem will keep occurring until the fear, anxiety or expectation is removed. These are just thinking errors, but will play havoc with your sex life!

A few people are able to resolve their issues in a 2 hour session. Most require a 1 hour and a 2 hour session., some people may need a session or so of Life Builder afterwards.

Please note. I do not regress people to remember abuse and trauma events, unless someone specifically asks for it. I will use a very radid form of hypnotic regression based on Flourish principles. It does not take several weeks it is normal to complete it in 3-4 sessions over 2 weeks.

There are two more groups below, I will work with people from these groups so long as they are 100% certain they want and need to change their psychosexual behaviours.

Paraphilias or the disorder of sexual preference is the unusual or abnormal sexual behaviour that does not follow the normal standards. This category of sexual disorder exhibits abnormal preference of sexual objects that include;

  • fetishism (preference for inanimate objects)
  • transvestism (wearing clothes of the opposite sex)
  • paedophilia (pre-pubertal children)
  • zoophilia (animals)
  • necrophilia (dead bodies)
  • persons with specific qualities like a deformity or handicap etc.

Sexual perversions are also due to some type of psychosexual disorder and include;

  • exhibitionism (exposing the genitals in public places for sexual excitement)
  • voyeurism (witnessing other’s sexual acts for arousal hideously)
  • sadism or sadomasochism (inflicting pain on others, while masochism is inducing pain to one’s own self during the act and deriving pleasure from it)
  • frotteurism (being excited by rubbing the genitalia against people in crowded public places)